Ice Janitors and Twizzlers

Oh Olympics, you are so damn funny! You are such a comedy genius and you don't even know it! Case in point: Ice Dancing. Forget the costumes (although they are pretty hilarious), forget that there seems to be some sort of rule that a sparkly headband for the ladies and greasy hair for the men is an artistic requirement, and forget that Ice Dancing is just couples skate for wussies. What is so hilarious about Ice Dancing is this: Twizzle! A Twizzle (according to Wikipedia) is a multi-rotation turn. What Wiki fails to mention is that apparently, a Twizzle must also involve some sort of spastic jazz hand movement and you must also have a look on your face like you've just heard a horrible joke and you're not sure if it's ok to think it's funny. Seriously, all the ice dancers wave their hands around and seem to be thinking, "That joke I heard earlier was really in poor taste, but damn was it funny. I couldn't laugh then because it wasn't proper but shit, I can't stop thinking about it and giggling like an idiot who farted in an elevator now!"

On the other hand, there is Curling. It takes skill, don't get me wrong, but I'll be damned if they don't look like a bunch of ice janitors frantically cleaning up after a kid who has just puked. Plus, there is the grunting and the yelling and the look of absolute boredom from the athlete’s children who have to be thinking, "God, when is this crap going to be over so we can go watch some snowboarding?" The fans (aside from the kids) and the announcers get totally into it and shout out random things like "CURL!" as they chug their eighth beer and high five each other. Well I’m sure the fans would agree with the new Curling motto, as Sam so geniusly came up with on Sunday as we were watching: "Curlers do it with stones!"

I can't help it

This is fucking funny: I Hate Horses

P.S.

P.S. Valentine's Day was just as fantastic as I thought it would be.

AND tonight is Project Runway night, yay! We will have lots of delicious drinks at the Tiki Bar then watch the best show ever while we have disgustingly horrible snacks--it's at my house tonight so there will be no homemade goodness from the lovely Slanger. Nope, it's frozen taquitos and pizza bites when I "cook." Hopefully the annoying Kara will be out as the delicious food goes in.

P.P.S. Seriously, more about Jazzercise coming soon, I know you can't wait.

Personality Test, hmmm.....

Ang took the free ColorQuiz.com personality test! "Wants interesting and exciting things to happen. A..." Click here to read the rest of the results.

And more

INFJ - "Author". Strong drive and enjoyment to help others. Complex personality. 1.5% of total population.

Free Jung Personality Test (similar to Myers-Briggs/MBTI)

Valentine's Day Plans--Jealous?

I have some awesome plans for Valentine's Day, would you like to hear about them? Of course you would! So, I'm going to work eight hours, then I'm going to go to--get this--the grocery store! And, I'm not going to buy food to make a romantic dinner for my boy, I'm going to buy food so I don't starve to death, hooray! Also, I have big plans to go to Jazzercise tonight (more about that later). Could my Heart Day get any better?

Actually, I celebrated VDay (or VD-ha ha) Saturday night too, with my good pal Slanger. We went out for a fancy dinner and were surrounded by happy and romantic couples. The best part was when we walked into the restaurant and the host assumed we were meeting people (aka "dates"). I think he felt sorry for us, you know, out without boyfriends. But come on, isn't VD just one more reason for single people to feel like shit and also, how did he know we weren't on a date? I'm not single, but I've never really celebrated VD. Isn't that what anniversaries are for? Anyway, Slanger and I had a grand time eating good food then had many drinks at the Tiki Bar (where no one gave us any "Why don't you have a date" looks), and I can't wait to celebrate VD with my boy at the grocery store tonight. Maybe we'll splurge and get some pink frosted donuts and beer--it really doesn't get any better than that!

Red Lobster is for the fashion forward

Ok, I admit it, I watch Project Runway and I like it. How could you not, it's freaking hilarious! Ok, two nights ago there was an ongoing joke about a contestant and a fashion mentor going to Red Lobster and getting in a tiff. You really had to see it but I promise you it was hilarious. Read more about it here: http://slangerhobo.blogspot.com/2006/02/red-lobster-try-not-to-laugh.html

You know you like it

Hey! You know how sandwiches are totally awesome? And how when someone else makes the sandwiches, they are even better? Well I'll tell you what, Slanger makes a mean sandwich and is a cool lady to boot. Check out her blog http://slangerhobo.blogspot.com/ but don't go bugging her for sandwiches, she'll make 'em when she's good and ready.

Hello friend

This is my pathetic attempt at a self-portrait. It might have been better if I wasn't drunk at the time.

drinks and a shiny shiny chandelier